


but i will not be gone in the morning

by minycrds



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Developing Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Red String of Fate, Relationship Study, Soulmates, Underage Drinking, fukurodani making out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:07:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26313886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minycrds/pseuds/minycrds
Summary: "Bokuto isn’t sure how to feel about the sleepy-eyed first year setter. He’s gorgeous, first of all, but he also seems quite unaffected in comparison to the other first years. For starters, he’s not staring at Bokuto wide-eyed like Bokuto was staring at him when he first walked into the gym, carrying behind him a red thread tied to his little finger like a tail as he stepped into their volleyball court".Red string of fate soulmates AU
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 11
Kudos: 118





	but i will not be gone in the morning

The first time Akaashi sees him he’s absolutely fascinated by his strong presence. Bokuto’s all energy, strength and solid muscle and he can’t tear his eyes from the ace of his new team. He’ll be able to be his setter as soon as he earns the starting position and he can’t start to fit into the team like an impeccable match.

Bokuto isn’t sure how to feel about the sleepy-eyed first year setter. He’s gorgeous, first of all, but he also seems quite unaffected in comparison to the other first years. He doesn’t look angry or upset, he just looks neutral and Bokuto doesn’t know how to feel about it. For starters, he’s not staring at Bokuto wide-eyed like Bokuto was staring at him when he first walked into the gym, carrying behind him a red thread tied to his little finger like a tail as he stepped into their volleyball court. It stretches through to the court, turning and twisting in knots and funny little shapes on the floor and it ends around Bokuto’s own little finger.

Bokuto stops breathing for a whole minute until his entire face is red and the colour drags down his neck. He clenches his fists hard, not sure of what to think, what to say, how to act around his freaking soulmate. Heck, no one even told him he was ready to see the thread that brought them together.

It makes sense looking back, though. 

In a way, Bokuto had always been ready to see it and to meet his soulmate. Ever since he was little, his mother would tell him about the red string of fate that joined her and his father and how that meant they were soulmates. Bokuto tried to find it, thinking that maybe if he hid very well under their parents’ bed it’d show under the moonlight, but it never did. Not even when he hid in the kitchen cabinet to see them kiss each other goodbye,  _ yuck.  _ Later, he’d been told you can only see the string that joins you and your soulmate and you can only see it when you’re ready to see it, giving people different scenarios where one of them was ready, but the other wasn’t; neither of them were or both were ready. The latter was the ideal situation, of course, and little Bokuto hoped that'd be the case for him.

According to his father everyone had a soulmate, sometimes even two of them if you were really lucky. It meant you were fated to one another and at some point of your life you were supposed to run into yours. It could be during your childhood, adolescence,  _ whatever _ . Some people weren’t that lucky and they met their soulmates at old age, having little to no time to spend with them, but that meant there were tons of different ways of living your life with or without a soulmate and that didn’t mean your life was less fulfilling than the others'. His mother told him very clearly ' _ Koutarou, don’t get upset if you have a hard time finding yours, okay? You will know when you see them, I promise'.  _

He wanted to know so bad it made him anxious. He had trouble sleeping at night thinking about what they’d be like, if they’d be fun to play with or even speak Japanese. His father had told him most times your soulmate was around your country, otherwise it’d be a mess, but there were some exceptions were you’d be fated to someone born in another continent who didn’t even speak your language and you just had to deal with it. He wondered if they’d be from Tokyo too, maybe they’d be from another country or a whole different continent too.

Sometimes he dreamt of being lost in a crowd with a million red strings wrapping themselves around his pinkie and they would all untie themselves one by one until he was left alone in the crowd, no strings to follow that fated him to anyone. If there were people out there with more than one soulmate he wondered if there were also those who simply didn’t have a soulmate and he prayed he wasn’t one of them with tears in his eyes because he really really wanted a best friend who would love him unconditionally and he could have fun with  _ forever _ . 

The subject wasn’t touched in school or among his friends. They were too little to talk about such a thing and parents were in charge of dealing with all that soulmate crap. It was tricky, particularly when rumors of different people in school being soulmates spread and he vividly remembered one girl tearing up in class because of it.

But damn, Bokuto wanted to talk about it with someone,  _ anyone _ who would listen. 

When he turned 15 the red string finally showed up around pinkie. It started as an itch around his finger that sometimes would burn the skin under. His skin would get irritated and bumpy, but then it’d go away and be forgotten for a couple of weeks until the itch started again. It bothered Bokuto to no end, especially when it started burning during a match and it made his spikes feel that bit off. Five months into the first time the ring shaped reaction showed up on his skin, there was a thin red string akin to a thread wrapped tight and securely around his pinkie. If he focused enough he could see it hanging down his seat, but never more than that. 

After his 16th birthday, Bokuto was able to see it going from his pinkie to the entrance of his classroom, making it clear that his soulmate wasn’t at least in that classroom. If he tried to follow it, it’d disappear on him midway and if he really focused on it he could see it moving, as if his soulmate was tugging on it. It occurred to him if he tugged it, maybe his soulmate would feel it, wherever they were. 

They never tugged back and Bokuto feared for a couple of months it meant they weren’t interested, but when he sees Akaashi he realises,  _ oh.  _ Fuck, he doesn’t know yet. 

He feels himself steadily falling for him as the time passes. There’s something about how quiet and composed he is that’s just so endearing. He’s the complete opposite of Bokuto and he believes that’s why his anxiety around him for the first few weeks after him joining the team doesn’t make anyone raise an eyebrow. They think Bokuto isn’t quite sure how to behave in front of someone as level headed as Akaashi, but Bokuto knows how to behave, he just doesn’t know how to do it in front of his blissfully unaware soulmate. The fact that Akaashi's undeniably gorgeous doesn't help. 

Akaashi’s cooperative and he quickly becomes an important part of the team, an invaluable and irreplaceable member and Bokuto inevitably becomes closer and closer to him. At first it’s plain curiosity, but then it’s the demanding trust and solid relationship aces are supposed to have with their setters and then Bokuto finds himself tugging at the red string on his pinkie every class, waiting for break where he simply follows the thread to where Akaashi is. Akaashi never questions how the hell Bokuto knew he wasn’t in his classroom or how he ran into Bokuto waiting for him with two sandwiches after gym class. 

Even as teens, soulmates are a touchy topic and it isn’t until a Friday night where they’re hidden under the dark near the train station and Konoha mentions something about his parents divorcing after finding their soulmates that he gets to talk about it with people his age. Konoha shrugs as if he doesn’t care, as if he hasn’t brought it up unprompted. Hours later, they’re drunk on their first illegal drinks in Konoha’s empty living room, holding a can of beer each. Akaashi looks unsure about the beer, he probably likes sake much more but he still takes little sips now and then. Bokuto finds drinking beer rather pleasing and thrilling as an underage. 

They’re all laughing at dumb jokes and there’s a youtube video playing in the background with a guy talking about tiny puzzles and how to put them together when Konoha starts crying a little. He’s not a crier, in fact, he never talks much about his feelings but there’s a hint of guilt in his voice when he talks about his little sister getting the wrong impression on soulmates when they’re supposed to be your perfect match and how he just wants her to be happy because she’s a little angel. Bokuto pats him on the back but he doesn’t really understand the feeling. He himself isn’t that sure soulmates are as perfect as they’re supposed to be, given the guy who is supposed to be his perfect match is drunk next to him, unable to see the string joining their pinkies and completely blind to the way Bokuto eyes him every other second, rejoicing in his drunken smile. 

Half an hour later they’re playing a weird combination of truth or dare and spin the bottle and giving each other their first kisses and Akaashi doesn’t really want to keep playing after Konoha begs for him to kiss him upon the bottle’s commands. Bokuto blushes deeply, to his very core, unaware of Akaashi’s heavy stare when he says ‘ _no, thank you, I’m good_ ’. Konoha doesn’t take it personally and when it’s his turn again, he kisses Saru a second too long and they all laugh at the way Saru’s eyes remain wide open throughout the kiss.

Bokuto kisses Konoha when it’s his turn because he really doesn’t want his team to know he always pees in the shower and then he’s kissing Washio, laughing into the awkward kiss as Washio’s thin and chapped lips try to follow his rhythm and the string on his pinkie tugs as if Akaashi’s heart itself was tugging him towards him. Bokuto lets go and eyes Akaashi shyly, but there’s nothing on his face besides the drunken shame of admitting that yes, he’s only into boys and even if he got a girl for a soulmate he’s sure he’d still be only into guys. 

“I’m not really sure about soulmates,” Onaga starts, following the topic Akaashi’s brought onto the table and Bokuto swallows thickly when he continues, “It just seems kinda weird to me. I’d like to choose who I’m destined to, you know?”

“That’s not how destiny works you dummy,” Komiyan snorts next to him and jabs him on the ribs with his elbow.

“I bet you’re glad you’re destined to someone, because I don’t know who’d put up with you on purpose,” Onaga continues, giving Komi a mean look after being interrupted, “I just feel like it has to be made up. Like, come on, could you imagine having Bokuto as your soulmate? That’s just not fair for anyone,” he jokes and Konoha and Komiyan cackle to his right. 

“That’s just rude! I’m making you do a thousand diving drills next practice,” Bokuto threatens, holding onto his second beer with all his strength. He wants to tell them  _ Look, my soulmate is right here you dummies, _ but he can’t. 

“Don’t be mean to our captain, we all know he’s a good boy,” Washio defends him and Bokuto smiles all big and honest at the praise. He misses the way Akaashi gazes lovingly at him for a second before their conversation keeps flowing. 

“I just think it’s dumb to pretend you can live without your soulmate. I mean, they tell us there’s a thousand different ways to cope with this whole soulmate thing but it sucks when it ends up destroying a family, y’know?” Konoha sighs into his hand, looking like he’s about to cry again, “And like, I just wanna make out with a shitload of people before I’m tied to a person,” he continues.

“Well, you just made out with most of your teammates so I think you’re following the right path,” Akaashi intrudes and everyone laughs again. He smiles into his beer can and Konoha blushes. 

“You got me there, mate”.

“I just think it’s cool to have someone destined for you. Like, loving you unconditionally and shit,” Bokuto blurts out despite himself. Maybe he’s a little too tipsy for this conversation considering his soulmate is right there next to him.

“Ugh, that’s just too corny,” Konoha says, unable to contain his laughter and Onaga downright cackles at the way Bokuto’s expression falls, “I’m sorry bro, I didn’t mean it like that. I just don’t believe in love like that but I’m glad your soul isn’t dead like mine,” he finishes.

Bokuto’s chest feels heavy with emotion and he isn’t sure if it’s Akaashi’s closeness or heartburn from all the beer but he’s damn glad he’s there. 

They walk home shoulder to shoulder, avoiding the topic of soulmates and talking about Bokuto’s endless homework he’s been avoiding for weeks. He talks about where they can go together during the weekend as  _ best friends do _ and he ignores the way his hand itches the whole way home to touch Akaashi’s while the thread drags along between them. Bokuto loves it when they’re this close and he can see both the beginning and the end of the thread and how the string knots and tangles as they walk. 

His mother told him he’d know who was the one and yes, he knew, he could see it, but no one had ever told him when was the right moment.

Bokuto becomes the captain of the team and his main concern is winning nationals, their whole team's is. They don’t care about university, they only want to grab the damn title they deserve and Bokuto really _ really  _ wants to be seen as one of the top three aces in Japan, as he should. He wants the title to prove it and as captain he’ll die before the title is stolen from them. Akaashi agrees wholeheartedly and Bokuto simply forgets. He forgets there’s a literal string tying them together and he tugs at it and plays with it during class to pass the time until practice. He tugs at it when their coach rambles on about strategy and he forgets Akaashi will have to become aware of it one day, be it now or later. 

During their extra practice time Bokuto always feels the string shorten. It tugs harder at him to move closer to Akaashi despite the meters and meters of red string on the floor sitting in wavy patterns under their feet. Bokuto knows perfectly how the string moves, opening up a path to him like Akaashi’s tosses do during matches. However, the string tugs at his heart when they’re alone as if trying to push him harder towards Akaashi, as if they could get even closer to volleyball standards. His pinkie is itchy all over again and he hates it but there are more important things to focus on than the damn itch he’d forgotten how to deal with ages ago. 

Bokuto isn’t really aware of what’s happening around him besides the fact he’s supposed to hit the ball perfectly, but Akaashi is.

Akaashi hasn’t heard much about soulmates besides the obvious. His parents didn’t really give him a talk like they were supposed to, he guesses, but he’s a resourceful little kid and being the very realistic person he is, he decides he’s not ready for it at ten years old. At fifteen, he still feels like he doesn’t want to know a thing about soulmates, until he hears his team discussing the concept of soulmates. He isn’t sure he agrees with anyone, he just hopes he likes his soulmate whenever he finds them, but he hopes they’re a he for all he’s worth because he secretly hopes that soulmate to be a lover and if they weren’t a he things would get rather tricky, he believes.

He isn’t sure he trusts destiny and he decides he doesn’t want to be ready to see the string come to life on his pinkie, there are more important things like being a good vice captain to Bokuto-san.

His pinkie starts getting itchy two months into his second year. He doesn’t know if it’s normal for it to be this unnerving, annoying and downright unbearable since he’s a damn setter. By the training camp he can clearly see a red string wrapped snugly around his pinkie and he wonders if he’ll be  _ lucky _ enough to have a soulmate who’s also into volleyball. 

He has to pinch himself when he sees the end of the red string tied around Bokuto freaking Koutarou’s pinkie. Akaashi doesn’t know why or how he’s seeing the string because he sure as hell isn’t ready, but there it is, tugging on his end when Bokuto absent-mindedly plays with it, oblivious to Akaashi’s awareness. 

How long has Bokuto-san known? How long has he been waiting? 

Akaashi decides to ignore it because he isn’t ready and a part of him thinks he’ll never be. 

They don’t win nationals and Akaashi feels the string tugging him closer to Bokuto as he cries, hiding his red tear-stained face behind his hands. Akaashi’s so damn angry he feels like he’ll explode if the fucking string keeps grazing against his skin, reminding him of something he didn't even want to know in the first place. His body and his heart hurt so damn much and Bokuto hugs him and thanks him for being the best vice captain he could’ve asked for and Akaashi’s never felt anything like this.

The string that usually tugs on his finger or his hands now tugs at his heart and he wants to get closer and closer. He wants to kiss Bokuto’s tears away and it’s gross but his ace deserves so much more than he managed it’s not fair. 

The entire team gets drunk again and end up playing truth or dare/spin the bottle again and this time both he and Bokuto choose truth after truth in order to avoid having to kiss anyone else. They’re not sure why, but they keep eyeing one another as if wondering  _ are you ready now? I’ve been waiting. _

Bokuto’s been waiting for years. In fact, he feels like it’s been so long he’s learnt to ignore the string dragging between them for Akaashi’s sake. He doesn’t want to burden him with something like this and if he has to wait for him, then he will wait as long as he has to. 

He’s been waiting so long, playing with the string to distract himself and looking at the way it tangles and lies around them that he fails to notice Akaashi tugging back every now and then. Akaashi follows his eyes as he follows the pattern of the string on the volleyball court on their last extra practice together and he wants to kiss the sadness out of Akaashi but he can’t. 

He’ll be graduating shortly and he’s been so good, so patient. He just doesn’t think it’s worth mentioning, at least not during their last practice together. Akaashi knows his plan in detail and they’ll stay in touch one way or another, best friends or not, soulmates or not. Bokuto will miss him so much it’s not fair they have to part ways. He’ll miss his entire team, but he isn’t sure if missing your soulmate after spending years with them can even compare to any sort of pain he’s felt in his life, especially when hugging your soulmate feels like  _ that _ .

They walk home avoiding the topic of volleyball, the heaviness of future plans and the nearing graduation ceremony. Bokuto hugs him close when they have to separate because Akaashi lives  _ that way _ and Bokuto has to go  _ this other way  _ and Bokuto whispers ‘Akaaaaashi’, elongating the ‘a’ as always, making sure Akaashi never forgets the way he sounds and how he feels in his arms, hoping it's exactly the way he feels it too. 

And Akaashi does. He feels the string tugging and tugging as Bokuto walks away from him and he wants to run and embrace him again but he doesn’t know how to face the fact that this is  _ it. _ He cries himself to sleep that night. 

Bokuto stops showing up to practice. His graduation is coming nearer and nearer and he’s supposed to prepare for his uni entrance exam so Akaashi doesn’t hold it against him. The whole team is unsettled and unbalanced without the third years, their practice sessions are shorter but the coach makes sure they get stronger as individuals before the year ends. 

They still hang out during breaks and on the weekends. Bokuto talks about his big university plans and Akaashi’s glad he’ll stay in Tokyo but he also knows uncertainty better than anyone when it comes to Bokuto. As his setter, at least, he was prepared to fight it, but as his soulmate, he has no idea how he’ll deal with it. 

Bokuto reassures him. They’ll stay in touch and hang out and if he’s time, he’ll pick him up and all. Bokuto’s convinced they’ve all the time in the world and Akaashi hopes he’s right. 

And then graduation day comes upon. Akaashi hides between his classmates, biting his lips and holding his tears back as he sees three members of his dear volleyball team receive their diplomas and walk off the stage to officially become Fukurodani alumni. 

The string tugs once, twice, three times. And it keeps tugging until he loses hope. It’s probably Bokuto anxiously playing with it while saying good bye to his classmate and his teachers. Akaashi wants to follow the string toward him but he runs the opposite way, hiding in the second set of stairs he finds on his way out of the auditorium where he knows no one will find him and cries into his hands. 

No one has ever hurt like this and he doesn’t understand why soulmates are a thing. They’re stupid, he thinks. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Bokuto whispers from behind him as he comes down to sit next to him. Akaashi wants a pat on the back, a hug,  _ anything  _ to make it stop hurting, “Are you alright, Akaashi?,” he asks, feigning innocence as if he isn't hearing Akaashi ugly sobbing into the sleeves of his blazer to try and stay silent.

Akaashi wonders if maybe he doesn’t bring it up because he doesn’t love him back. Maybe Bokuto doesn’t want him as his soulmate, maybe he’s stopped caring.

“I’m sorry, I’m not usually like this,” Akaashi apologises, keeping his eyes on the space between his feet on the step once he gets his breathing under control with bokuto's hand running up and down his back to help him calm down.

“It’s ok. I’ll miss you too,” Bokuto says and Akaashi can hear the smile on his voice but he’s sure he can also feel it in his chest, “We’ll stay in touch, right? And I promise I’ll go to every single match I can and I’ll drop by your house for dinner and everything,” he continues, this time attaching himself to Akaashi’s side as his hand snakes around his back to settle on his waist. 

“Yeah, I’ll see you around,” Akaashi says, more to himself than to Bokuto, nodding as if trying to convince himself Bokuto won’t break the promise.

“You know, Akaashi,” Bokuto starts, biting his lip as he goes and playing with the string around his pinkie, tugging lightly as he tries to find the courage in him to keep talking, “You were the best setter I could’ve asked for. Scratch that, best vice captain, best friend. No, bestest friend,” he continues. 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san. I also believe you were the best ace I could’ve asked for. I’m looking forward to seeing you playing with your new team,” Akaashi replies. It hurts to say the last part. 

“Seriously, Akaashi. I really wish you were more into volleyball, you know? I’d love to keep playing with you for real”

“Well, at least we know professional teams can keep up with your energy levels,” Akaashi jokes, trying to jab at Bokuto’s ego, but Bokuto only laughs quietly in response.

“You’re pretty good at it too”. 

“Yeah. I mean,” Akaashi starts, swallows back the lump in his throat, braces himself and tries to ignore the way his heart is threatening to come out of his mouth when he speaks up, “I’m your soulmate after all, aren’t I?” 

Bokuto’s breath catches and he doesn’t move, but Akaashi can feel him tensing against him. He has to tear his eyes from the spot they were burning into on the floor to make sure Bokuto’s okay. Bokuto's blushing furiously, failing to hide his face against Akaashi’s shoulder. 

Bokuto looks up with puppy eyes and Akaashi goes back to his usual fidgeting with the string. Bokuto stares at his hands as Akaashi keeps tugging on the string and starts wrapping it around his other fingers, bringing Bokuto’s hand closer to his as the string tangles around his hand and wrist. 

“That’s not fair, Akaashi,” Bokuto whispers, his face now perched on Akaashi’s shoulder on an impossibly uncomfortable angle. 

Akaashi brings Bokuto’s hand closer to his, tugging at the string hard and finally linking their pinkies together as if in a silent promise. Bokuto’s impatience gets the best out of him and he quickly links their hands together and starts rubbing at Akaashi’s knuckles with his thumb. 

“I’ve known since your first day here,” Bokuto states, beaming at Akaashi, “I was waiting for you to notice. You stole the spotlight,”. 

Akaashi can only smile as he tugs Bokuto even closer to him by bringing their linked hands to where Bokuto's other hand rests on his wait. He swears he can feel Bokuto's lips from where he is, only a few centimeters away. 

“Fuck, we should’ve made out drunk before this,” Bokuto whispers against his mouth and leans in, closing the distance. Akaashi feels something burst inside of him, akin to a firework or an orgasm, he isn't sure, but he's warm all over, drunk on love and Bokuto's scent and spit. 

Their hands are linked but the string keeps tugging and tugging and Akaashi wonders when it’ll be enough. He sighs in satisfaction only when Bokuto presses him against the wall behind him and they’re pressed flush chest to chest. Bokuto trembles as he kisses him again. 

He gets it now. 

  
  
  
  
  


  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in like three hours only to get it out of my system despite wanting to write a huge AU because I got drunk in the middle of it and I have no idea where this went. I don't know if you guys are into the idea of Fukurodani making out playing spin the bottle because I sure as fucking hell am and I want to write a fic dedicated to it but I've zero ideas, I just want Akaashi to make out with everyone, ngl. I wish he would've participated too, damn. Hope you enjoyed the gist of it? It'd be cool if you commented!
> 
> I'm at transakaashi on twitter in case you want to send prompts my way or whatever? I also may or may not turn this into a series, so I'd appreciate knowing if you're into that or not.


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